A?, more like Sc!

this was a good idea.

despite feeling like crying, and pondering about things,

it was a good idea.

bad nostalgia.

i guess.

i promise that i will treat my meat better from this point on.

● ○

three days.
three days.
three fucking days.

fuck disney.
fuck money.
fuck art.

gay bacon strips
gay bacon strips
gay bacon strips

bottom of the lake.

c

you got a fucking death wish

i m

a genie, it'll get done.

v t

i.

Call the cops. I don't give a fuck.

Stop fucking off.

Obviously, originality is dead. But sharing is caring.

So, stop fucking off.

Life is what you make it to be. There is no planned destiny. Sometimes, you just have to do what you have to do.
Life is not in fact destined. You make it what you want it to be.

STOP FUCKING OFF.

Don't ask yourself what the world needs; ask yourself what makes you come alive. And then go and do that. Because what the world needs is people who are alive.

STOP. FUCKING. OFF.

Those who want to live, let them fight, and those who do not want to fight in this world of eternal struggle do not deserve to live.

Stop fucking off.

The infinite possibilities each day holds should stagger the mind. The sheer number of experiences I could have is uncountable, breathtaking, and I'm sitting here refreshing my inbox. We live trapped in loops, reliving a few days over and over, and we envision only a handful of paths laid out ahead of us. We see the same things each day, we respond the same way, we think the same thoughts, each day a slight variation on the last, every moment smoothly following the gentle curves of societal norms. We act like if we just get through today, tomorrow our dreams will come back to us.
And no, I don't have all the answers. I don't know how to jolt myself into seeing what each moment could become. But I do know one thing: The solution does not involve watering down my every little idea and creative impulse for the sake of some day easing my fit into a mold. It does not involve tempering my life to better fit someone's expectations. It does not involve constantly holding back for fear of shaking things up. This is very important, so I want to say it as clearly as I can:

Fuck.
That.
Shit.



ohfuckicantswim.

refuse. resist.

try me.

rattling through a prison of introspection

watching games for charity.

and this time, armchair activism actually works.

Go TLO~!

This is that zen bullshit they're talking about.

I'm really fucking good at it.

I have never listened to music.

blue

When life itself seems lunatic, who knows where madness lies? To surrender dreams - this may be madness; to seek treasure where there is only trash. Too much sanity may be madness! But maddest of all - to see life as it is and not as it should be.

i doubt.

i'm a brotha with a furious mind.

disregard women acquire currency

at least I'm still alive

what

you want to go on a... a what? a playdate? are we five? unless we get to fuck in the sandbox, the answer is no.

bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

the sound of a thousand bees in my ears, can't shake the static

bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

I haven't done this in a while

I, for one, welcome our half-dragon, half-octopus, half-humanoid elder gods.

Mudamudamudamudamudamudamudamudamudamudamudamudamudamudamudamuda

Es ist der allgemeine Zustand, nicht du.
Es war schon immer so. Etwas geht nicht wie ich's will, et voilà, ich brauch meine Ruhe. Ich muss das selber lösen.

Prima donna ich, Prima donna du. Elektrizität ist hoch; Kompromisse müssen sein, aber nie soll ich mich selbst verleugnen.

Es gibt nicht nur dich/mich auf der Welt. Es gibt auch andere.

MUDDAH.

Und wenn was passiert,
dann, wie Mutti sacht,
Ehrlichkeit, Offenheit, Klarheit,
was dabei rauskommt... das ist doch das Schöne dabei. Das ist die Reise die man zusammen unternimmt.

So what if some conversations aren't positive, or end up in us not talking for a week? That's part of life. We learn about each other that way.
And hey, if you ever throw a tantrum where you'll tear me a new one, have an episode where you scowl me into the lowest circle of hell... I'll just come back half an hour later and ask you if you've calmed down, with boyish innocence gleaming on my face and nothing but good intentions in my veins.

Break yourself

Maybe I was a bit too irrational last night.
I hope she didn't hear, or if, understand me.
That was the illness and the hint of whiskey talking.
You know that I possess sensibility, but that is being impaired by me being sick.


♥ Mom, though, for being there for me in my moment of despair.

Fuck you.
Fuck you for shitting on my heart and my love.

In addendum

I want to cry, too.
But that's not possible.

I'm congested, coughing like a mafaka, and sitting right next to the fucking door where you are probably sleeping in right now. Sleeping the just and fair sleep.

I know that it's not right of me to contest that you are not allowed to,
but as I mentioned like a few minutes ago, there is the hunch of mine where I believe you are not aware of some things.

I feel like I should be the person to show you, but I think that that would not end up the way I want it to.

I should quit you.

I should concentrate on school, on life, on moving on.

Fuck you, you make me want to leave, I don't want to leave you.

I'm better now, though. I'm getting studying done when I'm not regurgitating the mother of all phlegm.



Put some effort into this.
It seems like your world is working out just as fine, as long as you get what you want,
so either you want this friendship, or whatever, or not.

I don't like ultimatums, so it'll end up in a conversation, which I'm not going to start, but wait forever for you to do so.

But no, now you can actually respect what I ask for and leave me alone?

I don't get you, sometimes.
I'm still learning. I hope that it'll help me, you.


Knowing my luck... probably just me, after the great divide.

Almost a week

And I've learned so much.
About myself, about you.

But can I use it without hurting either of us?

No.

That's the problem.

If I use what I've learned and what I want to put into work for myself... I'll end up hurting myself and you.
If I use what I've learned and what you seem to want at this very moment... I'll end up hurting myself.

The problem is: either way, I have to learn how to cut ties with you. I don't want to, as much as it pains, I don't want to lose you.

Sure, naive and optimistic as we both are, we both want to maintain a friendship after this, but it'll be awkward, no matter what either of us say, think or wish for right now.


I want to break free from this. I believe that things can be better, without tears, but from this point of time and place... it'll be difficult, and it'd require something that I cannot possibly achieve.

Fuck it. It's so hard being sentient, empathetic, and caring
for someone
who
does not
understand
when
they
hurt
you.

Or understands various other factors that seem not to bother you at all.

At least I'm getting it off my shoulder in some way.




I wish you would see what I see.

Same thing,

fuck off, cause I hate you all.